Digital Bulletin No 95

May 2026

Panel showing our Club's name, Graham's name as our President and the 2025-26 Rotary theme.

Club members please log in for more information.

May 2026

From the editor’s desk

In the early 1980s one of our children asked me “Dad, did they have phones in your day?” For a moment I was taken aback. Just how old did they think I was?

If our grandsons ever ask the same question they will be talking about mobile phones. What questions will the children of today’s children be asking and what will Rotary look like then

Nostalgia isn’t what it used to be.

Words from the President

April 1

The 1st April is always a special date for me since it happens to be my birthday. I say special because it’s been one of those dates in the year which family always remember, being All Fools Day or more commonly known as April Fools Day. I’ve got used to the jokes over the years but surprisingly never been subject to any pranks.

April 2

The 2nd April should have been our Business Meeting on Zoom. However, following my hip replacement, I had to attend a long physio session over the lunchtime period and both our Secretary and Vice President were unavailable, hence it was decided to cancel the meeting and anything important would have been emailed to members or held over to the next time.

April 9

Our meeting on 9th April was held at the Ivy Hill and our guest speaker was Patrick Bell, a funeral celebrant and storyteller. Being lunchtime I was expecting a bit of a humorous presentation, perhaps alluding to some of the mishaps at funerals. But Patrick gave a polished account of the different types of funerals, their different locations and venues and the design of the funeral service.

We learnt that the most popular music played at a funeral tended to be “Always look on the bright side of life”, followed by “The Lord’s my Shepherd”, “Abide with me”, “Match of the day” then “My Way”. “All things bright and beautiful” came in at number six.

Patrick said that locations were no longer the traditional church but included pubs, theatres, golf clubs, and even a conference suite in Ipswich. Patrick emphasised the role of the celebrant working with the family to design the order of service to bring out the memorable touches and he concluded with the thought, “In the end you’ll be defined by the story you leave behind.”

I was delighted to present Peter Kemp with a Paul Harris Fellowship award in recognition of his former time as Club President and the voluntary work he does besides Rotary.

April 10

On 10 April Francis Whitbread and I attended a Zoom meeting of the Chelmsford Club Presidents and Secretaries. This was an opportunity to update the other Chelmsford Clubs on the events we are intending to hold. These included my President’s Lunch to be held on 25 June at the Essex Barn, Channels (flyer to follow) plus the Senior Citizens’ party on 4 July at the Chapter House.

I was also able to inform the other Clubs that we had pledged £500 to Porridge and Pens plus £100 to the Scouts Jamboree.

April 16

On 16 April we held a Fellowship Meeting in the Snug area at the Ingatestone Saddlery. This was well attended and a chance to chat in less formal surroundings.

April 23

The 23rd April saw us back at the Ivy Hill Hotel for a lunchtime meeting. We welcomed our guest speakers from Firstsite, George Karaiskou and Connar Ridd. Together with a slide show they gave us an excellent insight into the Firstsite charity, located in Colchester. A number of our members had visited the contemporary visual arts experience.

But the focus of the talk from George and Connar was the community programme run for families and children aged 4 to 11 years during the school holidays. Responding to community needs, they provide some 30,000 hot meals to children during school holidays, undertake some 1,000 sport and art activities and run community events and workshops to tackle isolation. More information is available on the Firstsite websites.

April 25

On the 25th April we held one of our regular Jumble Sales at Danbury Village Hall, always a fun day and an opportunity for members to bond and enjoy a day out from the ordinary.

The Jumble Sale raised £473.50 which, considering we had less jumble than usual, was a rewarding amount. Special thanks go to Alison Moses for managing the arrangements and the refreshments on the day and Bob Booker for sorting out all the cash. And thanks to all the members who set up the stalls, provided jumble, helped sort it out during the morning and those who sold it during the afternoon and cleared everything away.

A worthwhile event in the community raising money for our charities.

April 29

Picture of various pull-up banners On Wednesday, 29th April, Keith Dabbs and I attended the Chelmsford CVS Volunteering Showcase at Chelmsford Cathedral. Numerous charities were represented and it was an opportunity for them to display their pull-ups around the cathedral.

The speakers gave us an update on local authority reorganisation and the future of the NHS in our locality.

A great opportunity for charities to network.

Spring Jumble Sale

Alison Moses

Many thanks to all who helped with the Jumble Sale on 25 April. The date given to us was the last of the scheduled jumble sales for the first half of 2026. They will resume on 2 October 2026.

Unbeknown to us we followed a massive school jumble the week before. This might explain why we received less jumble than normal. All that said, the hard work from Rotarians throughout the day brought in a grand result of £473.50. I would also like to thank on the Club’s behalf the external help from Nigel, Trevor and Shirley Bailey, Anne Scott, Gordon, another gentleman whose name I don’t know and the three ladies from Danbury Village Hall. Without the additional help we would have struggled. And not forgetting Tim who always saves the day.

Again many thanks to all.

Problems with phones

Keith Otter

Computer image of a dial phone

Writing from the editor’s desk this month started me thinking about my own history with telephones.

When I left home I bought a new flat in Wallington in Surrey. I arranged for a telephone to be installed. In those days there was only one telephone company, the state-owned General Post Office. I wanted what was then the latest handset, a Trimphone.

Computer image of an early push-button phone The GPO installed the line but it was some weeks before they could connect it to the local exchange. They had to wait for the exchange to be upgraded so it could handle more connections.

When the line was connected I discovered my mistake. Unlike the other handset available, the Trimphone didn’t ring but produced an electronic warble. I soon realised that even at the loudest setting I couldn’t hear it if I was in another room.

When Pat and I married and moved to Springfield we didn’t initially arrange for a phone. That was fine until one afternoon when I found myself marooned in London by a train strike. I couldn’t phone Pat to let her know what was happening. When I failed to return home she went round to our nearest public phone box and rang her parents in London to see if they had heard from me. “Yes,” said her mother, “he’s sitting here eating dinner.”

We quickly asked for a phone to be installed.

It was placed by the front door, at the bottom of the stairs. A few months later it rang very early one morning when we were fast asleep. I put my slippers on, went downstairs and answered it.

A man with an Irish accent explained that he was a telephone operator and would I accept a reversed charges call from Dublin? Since we have a very good Irish friend I agreed, although I had no idea why she should phone us at such a strange hour.

She hadn’t. Whoever the caller was asked who I was. “Keith?!!” was her response when I told her. Fortunately the Irish operator had remained on the line, realised there was a problem and took the call back.

I can’t claim it was that which prompted us, but some years later we were early adopters of cordless phones. The base unit replaced the downstairs phone and we put the cordless phone in our bedroom.

We realised our mistake early one evening when we were listening to the radio in the kitchen and our daughter was using the upstairs phone to call a schoolfriend. We heard our daughter’s voice coming over the radio! The upstairs phone was using a frequency very close to Radio 4. That couldn’t happen with today’s cordless phones.

When the direct dialling of international calls was introduced, my firm put restrictions on the office phones so that they couldn’t be used for an international number without going through the switchboard. An exception was made in my case because of the number of international calls I had to make for my work. There was one condition. I had to lock my handset in an office drawer when I went home at night.

That may have been wise. Rumour had it that the last act of a disgruntled Australian employee, who left the firm on a Friday, was to phone the Sydney speaking clock and leave the call connected. It wasn’t discovered until the following Monday morning.

In the 1990s my firm installed a completely new phone system. One facility allowed anyone to put an automatic redirect on their office phone so that an incoming call would be diverted to some other UK number. When I was going to be out of the office I diverted my calls to my mobile.

That was OK until one person who phoned me asked me to transfer him back to the switchboard. I had to explain that I couldn’t do so because I was actually on a train to Birmingham!

Our daughter had a similar experience when she worked for a while on the BUPA switchboard after leaving university. The switchboard dealt with incoming calls to any BUPA office in the country. A display showed the operator which office had been called.

One caller said he was on his way to the BUPA office. Could she kindly glance out the window and let him know if there were any free spaces in the car park? She told him that she was based in Slough and had never even seen the Manchester office car park.

By the time I retired my own firm had a similar unified switchboard for the entire country. I never did know where it was.

Random jottings

Today I saw a dwarf climbing down a prison wall. I thought to myself, “That’s a little condescending.”

I won’t be impressed with technology until I can download food.

Which letter in the word “scent” is silent? Is it the S or the C?

Getting older has some benefits. Call it a senior moment and you can get away with pretty much anything.

How come “abbreviated” is such a long word?

President’s Lunch 2026

Essex Barn, Channels Estate, Chelmsford, CM3 3PT
Thursday, 25 June 2026, 12 noon for 12:30

Please come and join President Graham for his President’s Lunch on the 25th June to celebrate the completion of his year as our President.
The speaker will be Peter Hennessey from Essex & Herts Air Ambulance.
The cost is £24 per head and guests are welcome.