2023

“Tim Melville-Walker: Dashing former solicitor and now Deputy District Judge of His Majesty’s Courts and Tribunals Service, will present his job talk “Send Him Down! Judging the Rotary way” on Monday 20th February.

 Tim was born sufficiently long ago now that he is not going to remind you, especially after the incident with the surprise Hippo Birthday cake that you scoundrels were all in on. A second generation solicitor, Tim was inspired to follow his late father’s path into the law after an incident where his aforementioned father was allegedly exceeding the speed limit (by a generous margin) with young Tim in the car. There was a sudden flashing of blue lights and a distinctive siren from behind, whereupon Melville-Walker senior uttered a word that innocent young Tim had not heard before. However, when the police car pulled alongside, the officers therein looked over, recognised dad, waved and promptly drove on. “I must”, thought the young Tim, “get in on this!”

Having attended Birmingham university to undertake a degree in law and business studies, followed by vocational training, Tim started his apprenticeship (then called a “training contract”) with the firm of Woodford and Ackroyd in Southampton. It was slightly disconcerting that the firm changed the very next day to be “Trethowan Woodford” but Tim bravely struggled on to qualify as a solicitor, securing his first full solicitor job with MacDonald Oates in Petersfield, literally being the family department for the Petersfield office. Totally unrelated to the incident when Tim suddenly stopped being the IT partner (after allegedly threatening to “hang, draw and quarter” the IT support officer), Tim later moved to the Midhurst office, eventually leading to the fateful meeting with a highly disreputable group laterally known as “the Rotary Club of Midhurst and Petworth”.

Tim became a partner and later the head of the family department, after the previous mug sensibly left to become a mediator. As if that was not awesome enough, Tim then became a Deputy District Judge – having (silently) complained that he could have done a better job in so many Court hearings, Tim unwisely decided to prove it. He maintained all his solicitor work at the same time, to become a “gamekeeper turned poacher” as knowing how judges think of course makes it far easier to manipulate them… Finding himself doing the jobs of solicitor, partner, head of department, judge and general hero all at the same time and only getting paid once, Tim decided in June 2022 to stop soliciting and move to full time judging, whereupon he promptly fell off a ladder and narrowly avoided being killed…by his wife Sara, for being an utter twit